THE ROAD NOT TAKEN

PATRICK MAHOMES FOLLOWS IN HIS FATHERS FOOTSTEPS AND CHOSES BASEBALL OVER FOOTBALL AT TEXAS TECH. HE GOES ON TO A LACKLUSTER CAREER AS A RELIEF PITCHER WITH A ERA OF 4.97 WITH THE KANSAS CITY ROYALS, INSTEAD OF LIGHTING UP THE FOOTBALL WORLD AS A KANSAS CITY CHIEF.

DOROTHY ACCIDENTLY LANDS HER HOUSE ON THE MAYOR OF MUNCHKIN LAND. SHE AND TOTO THEN REALIZE THAT THE INHABITANTS ARE ACTUALLY CALLED MUNCHING AS THEY ARE REALLY CANNIBALS, AND DOROTHY AND TOTO MUST FLEA FOR THEIR LIVES. A UNIVERSALLY LOVED CHILDREN'S CLASSIC TURNS INTO A STEPHEN KING NIGHTMARE.

YO ADRIAN, HAVE YOU SEEN MY 2 PET TURTLES? I CALL  THEM CUFF AND LINK. 

ROCKY, I'M SORRY. I DIN'T KNOW THOSE WERE YOUR PETS. I MADE A SOUP WITH THEM FOR SUPPER.

ROCKY IS NOW SERVING 25 YEARS TO LIFE FOR MANSLAUGHTER AND NEVER BECAME THE CHAMPION BOXER WE KNOW.

THE UNIVERSITY OF MISSOURI FIRES HEAD BASKETBALL COACH QUIN SNYDER AFTER THE 2002 SEASON, AND HIRES BILL SELF. SELF A BIG 12 ALLUMNI, PLAYING AT OKLAHOMA STATE AND ASSISTANT COACH AT KANSAS, IS EXCITED TO BE BACK IN THE BIG12. HE GOES ON TO MAKE MU A NATIONAL BASKETBALL POWERHOUSE AND PERENIAL TOP 10 TEAM.

FRED AND BARNEY ARE DRINKING AT THE BEDROCK BOWL WHEN BARNEY PASSES OUT. FRED STUMBLES HOME AND ACCIDENTLY ENTERS THE RUBBLE HOUSE. BETTY PRETENDS THAT HE IS BARNEY AND SEDUCES FRED. BARNEY COMES HOME AND FINDS FRED AND BETTY TOGETHER, AND FRIENDSHIP FOR INFINITY IS REPLACED BY 2 NEIGHBORS THAT HATE EACH OTHER.

GILIGAN AND THE SKIPPER REALIZE THEY ARE GAY. THEY QUIT THE TOUR BOAT ROUTINE AND OPEN UP A SEAFOOD RESTURANT ALONG THE COAST. RESULTING IN 3 YEARS OF ONE OF MY FAVORITE TV SHOWS NEVER AIRING.

UNTIL NEXT TIME

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU GOT UNTIL IT IS GONE

THE BEGGAR'S APPRENTICE